Overwhelmed

Lately I've been feeling very homesick. Coming to a new country with people I'm not familiar with has been a tough transition for me, personally. I'm someone who enjoys one-on-one interaction because having a bigger group leads to exclusion and cliques. I like knowing I have a voice and an opinion when it's just me and one or two other people rather than going with the flow and being dragged along. That's how I've felt for the past few days. Like I'm just a toy that a little kid is pulling along and eventually drops out of boredom. But for the most part, everybody has stuck with each other and has tried to listen to the other students. The only problem is there are just TOO many people. I don't have a say in anything. Where we go. If I know where we're going, nobody listens to me. So, I'm slowly learning to keep quiet. Maybe this is a lesson from God. I don't know.

I'm used to having a smaller group of friends that I'm familiar with. People that know my sense of humor and know my heart. I've been feeling lost and isolated. I didn't think I would struggle with these bouts of feelings but I have. I'm trying to figure out where I belong and where I fit. Like a puzzle, I can't place myself in a slot I don't belong or the puzzle gets damaged.
I've been trying to stay in the Europe rather than connecting with people in the states since I want to make the most of my time here. But I skyped with one of my close friends because I REALLY needed it. And I felt better afterwards. I talked to him about what's been going on and he told me he'd pray for me.

So last night I told my roommate how I was feeling and we prayed together.
There's something about community prayer.
It's different.
It's powerful.

And I felt better today. I'm not completely okay but I'm getting there.

Transitioning to what's happened today now.

We had a class session where we talked about the universe and God. Then we were sent off to the National Art Gallery, which is FULL of famous paintings. I was very excited for this outing.
My freshman year of college I took an European art class and all the paintings I saw in the book were in this museum. I walked into the gallery and was so overwhelmed I was almost crying. To see these paintings in person was so much different than seeing them in a book. It's the tangibility that I was experiencing. I was standing 2 feet from Monet paintings and Van Gogh. I was standing 2 feet from these HUGE paintings that took up a wall. It was incredible.

Later on tonight I'm going to King's Cross Station to see platform 9 and 3/4.